High school sucks, Shishido thought angrily. He was in his fifth year, he'd lazed his way through high school, and was now taking the optional fifth year to get all the courses he needed for university. Choutarou, however, had done no such slacking and was liable to graduate this year as well.
This was all well and good, but it meant that Shishido and Choutarou got to spend next to no time together with the huge homework load that being in the final year of high school brought.
Shishido had finished his homework early enough that a trip to Choutarou's dorm would be well worth it. Well, not that any trip to Choutarou's room wasn't worth it, but usually it was only about ten or fifteen minutes, and today there was an hour before curfew.
Shishido waltzed into Choutarou's room. Choutarou's dorm-mate had quickly gotten used to Shishido's comings and goings and had developed the habit of remaining in the library until just before curfew, and locking the door when he was doing something he didn't want Shishido walking in on.
Today, however, was not one of the days where Choutarou's room-mate felt the need to be present.
Shishido looked around the room, Choutarou was not at his desk; good, good, more likely that he wouldn't still be doing homework.
Shishido glanced over at Choutarou's bed (there wasn't really any place else he could be), and his heart stopped.
Choutarou was indeed sprawled on the bed, but he didn't appear to be done his homework, as the textbooks for his three courses were spread around him, as well as his binders, open. On Choutarou's lap was his laptop, headphones jacked in. On his other side were several books that Shishido assumed to be fore reference, open to various places, post-it notes sticking out from all angles.
It wasn't Choutarou's half-buried state that had caused Shishido's chest to clench painfully, it was the fact that Choutarou had flopped backwards onto the bed, one arm thrown over his eyes, headphones pulled off one ear, chest heaving erratically and Shishido could hear the quiver of suppressed tears or sobs in the younger boys breathing.
"Choutarou?" Shishido asked softly, stepping into the room, shutting the door softly behind him as he frowned worriedly at his boyfriend.
"Shishido-san?" Choutarou whimpered, and Shishido's heart broke, hearing the pain in that broken whisper.
"Choutarou," Shishido whispered, rushing across the room to the bed, dropping down beside his boyfriend, "What's wrong? What happened?" Shishido tugged on the arm over Choutarou's face, he hated when the younger boy was upset, it was on of the things that pissed Shishido off the most, and generally made him want to beat the crap out of whatever was making him upset.
Choutarou allowed Shishido to pull his arm away from his face, looking up at his boyfriend with watery eyes. "What are we supposed to do?" Choutarou asked, choking the words past suppressed tears.
Shishido blinked, confused, glancing at the laptop, hoping for a clue as to what Choutarou was talking about. Reading just a few sentences of the essay on the screen, Shishido couldn't help but melt a little, Choutarou's heart was just too big, sometimes.
Shishido pulled Choutarou into a tight hug, ignoring the sharp corner of the laptop digging into his ribs and the edge of Choutarou's headphones pressed uncomfortably at the underside of his jaw. But Choutarou was pressing his face into the place where Shishido's neck and shoulder met, and Shishido could feel hot tears slide down his neck and pool at his collar bone, "What are we supposed to do, Shishido-san?" Choutarou sobbed out, nuzzling against Shishido's neck, tightening his hold on his boyfriend. "There's so many people who're being taken advantage of—who's lives are complete crap, and we're sitting here and how can we do that, Shishido-san? How can we just carry on, going to school and ignoring what's going on in the rest of the world? How… How can we live like this?"
Shishido tightened his hold on his distraught boyfriend mutely, holding him through his body-wrenching sobs after he'd descended into incoherency.
Finally, some time later (long enough that the collar of Shishido's shirt was damp and rubbing uncomfortably against his neck) Choutarou's breathing leveled out and his trembling had finally stilled.
Shishido nuzzled against Choutarou's ear, "I don't know about all that, love, you know I don't think about things like that. All I know is that we've got to live the best we can. If we start worrying about what other people don't have like have a responsibility to fix it, then you'll go crazy."
"But we can't just say 'sucks to be you' and ignore it."
Shishido tightened his grip on Choutarou, "I know," he whispered.
Choutarou nuzzled against Shishido's collar bone, "I don't know how to do this, Shishido-san."
Shishido put his chin on Choutarou's head, "You did it before."
Choutarou whimpered, "But I didn't know."
Shishido pulled back and planted a brief kiss on Choutarou's lips. Choutarou's red eyes came up to look at Shishido, and Shishido gave Choutarou a slower, longer kiss. "Choutarou, stop thinking about it, you'll go crazy. Maybe there's something we can do, like raise money for a charity or something."
Choutarou sighed, "It just doesn't seem right," he said, deflated.
Shishido kissed Choutarou between his eyes, "I know, love, I know," he murmured, pulling Choutarou back into a hug.
After several long minutes Shishido finally spoke again, "Your laptop is digging into my bladder, Choutarou."
Choutarou laughed, long and loud, before pounding on Shishido and proceeding to make other loud noises.
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